Tired of Power Struggles? Try This Research-Backed Way to Help Kids Learn Life Skills
Jul 25, 2025
Helping children become more independent with daily routines like dressing, cleaning up, or brushing their teeth can be incredibly rewarding—but also incredibly frustrating when those tasks lead to tears, avoidance, or meltdowns. For many kids, especially those with nervous system differences like ADHD, autism, developmental coordination disorder (DCD), or sensory processing challenges, multi-step tasks can feel overwhelming. That’s where backward chaining comes in.
Unlike traditional methods that ask children to start at the beginning of a task and work forward, backward chaining flips the script—giving them the chance to master the final step first. It’s a strategy rooted in neuroscience, learning theory, and compassion. Whether you’re a parent trying to make mornings smoother or a teacher supporting students in the classroom, backward chaining can help children experience success, reduce anxiety, and build lasting independence—one step at a time.
What is Backward Chaining?
Backward chaining is a method where the last step of a task is taught first. Once the child masters that, you add the second-to-last step, then the one before that, and so on—building the sequence in reverse.
This is the opposite of forward chaining, where the child starts with step one and builds forward. In backward chaining, the adult completes the early steps and lets the child finish the task.
Why Backward Chaining Works (Especially for DCD and Similar Profiles)
Children with DCD and similar challenges often struggle with:
• Planning and sequencing steps
• Working memory (remembering what comes next)
• Motor execution (getting the body to do what the brain envisions)
• Sustaining attention over a long process
• Emotional regulation when mistakes pile up
With backward chaining:
• The child always ends with success
• They experience the rewarding part of the task (completion)
• It reduces frustration by limiting the number of steps they must coordinate
• It helps them build confidence and muscle memory, one step at a time
Example: Getting Dressed
Let’s say a child struggles to put on their shirt.
1. Step 1 (initial phase):Parent helps with arms, head, alignment, and the child pulls the shirt down at the end. This is their “success step.”
2. Step 2: Parent helps with arms and head, but now the child pulls both arms through the sleeves and finishes pulling the shirt down.
3. Step 3: Parent hands the child the shirt; child puts head in, arms in, and pulls down.
Eventually, the parent fades out completely.
Example: Brushing Teeth
1. Parent does most of the brushing; child rinses mouth and puts toothbrush away.
2. Parent brushes, child rinses, then does a final brush stroke on front teeth.
3. Over time, the child takes over more steps, ending with their familiar “finishing step.”
Example: Classroom Routine
Let’s say a student struggles with cleaning up after centers.
1. Teacher does most of the clean-up, and child puts final toy in the bin.
2. Teacher leaves more for the child to clean, gradually backing off as the child builds independence.
3. Eventually, the child is cleaning up the whole station with minimal prompting.
Example: Cooking or Life Skills
For a teenager learning to make a sandwich:
1. Parent lays out bread and ingredients; child puts on the top slice and cuts it.
2. Child adds one topping, then finishes sandwich.
3. Child makes the entire sandwich once they’re ready.
Example: Showering or Bathing
For children with motor planning or sensory sensitivities:
1. Parent does washing, and child rinses and dries off.
2. Child starts washing arms and legs, with support for back or hair.
3. Gradually, the child takes over full body washing and hygiene sequence.
Who Else Benefits from Backward Chaining?
Children with ADHD
• Helps break down executive function overwhelm
• Reduces task avoidance by removing the pressure to start
• Builds working memory through repeated exposure to steps
Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)
• Supports visual/motor sequencing with a predictable end-point
• Reinforces routine and structure
• Reduces anxiety from unpredictability or open-ended instructions
Children with Intellectual Disabilities
• Makes task completion achievable
• Encourages independence with support
• Allows for meaningful participation even when full task completion is not yet possible
Anxious or Perfectionistic Children
• Keeps the experience positive by minimizing early mistakes
• Reinforces success instead of highlighting errors
Typically Developing Kids
• Useful when introducing complex routines (e.g., tying shoes, making beds, multi-step chores)
• Great for tasks that are new, overwhelming, or require sequencing
How to Implement Backward Chaining: A Simple Guide for Parents and Educators
To get started with backward chaining, first identify a specific daily routine or skill your child is struggling with—such as getting dressed, brushing teeth, packing their backpack, or cleaning up toys. Break the task down into small, manageable steps. For example, brushing teeth might involve getting the toothbrush, applying toothpaste, brushing, rinsing, and putting the toothbrush away.
In the beginning, you’ll do all of the earlier steps for the child, and let them complete the final step on their own. For example, if the child struggles with brushing teeth, you might do all the brushing and hand them the cup to rinse and put the toothbrush away. This allows them to experience success and completion.
Once the child becomes confident and consistent with that last step, you gradually add one more step earlier in the sequence for them to try. In our example, the next time, the child might apply the toothpaste themselves, brush with your support, and then complete the rinsing and cleanup independently. You continue this process—working backwards through the sequence—until the child can complete the entire task independently.
Throughout the process, your role is to scaffold, model, and celebrate success, even if progress is slow. Use simple, supportive language, offer visual cues if needed, and keep expectations realistic. The key is to ensure the child always ends on a successful note. This builds confidence, reduces frustration, and helps encode the task in a way that feels achievable, rather than overwhelming.
Tips for Using Backward Chaining Effectively
• Use visual checklists alongside backward chaining for routines
• Keep tone positive and encouraging
• Allow extra time so the child isn’t rushed
• Don’t over-correct minor imperfections—success is the goal
• Adjust the chain based on how many steps the child can manage
Bottom Line
Backward chaining empowers children by letting them succeed at the most meaningful part of the task—finishing. It is developmentally respectful, emotionally protective, and neurologically supportive. For kids with DCD, ADHD, sensory processing challenges and beyond, it’s a tool that promotes confidence, builds independence, and fosters a sense of “I can do this”—one step at a time.
Parenting Alongside You,
Dr. Emma and The Aparently Parenting Team
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